2020-04-09

●EDITORIAL● Am I approaching the winter of my life?

As seen on the November 2019 issue of The Philippine Sentinel

We are all mortals and everybody is going to die. That’s for sure. No matter how much premium we pay, no insurance company can guarantee that policy holders shall live forever. Being insured somehow gives us confidence but still, no money can buy life.

Being a septuagenarian, I have outlived both my parents. My father did not even reach sixty in spite of having been heavily insured. Thanks to advances in medical technology and regular dosage of maintenance pills, I am still alive and otherwise look healthy.

But lo and behold! Both of my hands are shaking. When I strike the keyboard, I occasionally hit the wrong letter.

At least one General Practitioner has diagnosed me to having “Essential Tremor.” I asked what’s that? The answer was short and simple: “You are
getting old.”

The skin on my arms are no longer as smooth as they used to be. The back
of my palms clearly show bluish and thick veins. On my face? What I see on
the mirror is not the same face I had when I was a fresh graduate from the
university.

But my vision is still good. Aha! Thanks to laser surgery on both eyes and the replacement of my natural lens, I can still see very clearly and able to write this editorial.

It seems like yesterday that I was young, just married, and embarking on my new life with my wife. Yet in a way, it seems like centuries ago.

Where have all those years gone to? I know that I lived them all. I have
glimpses of how it was back then and of all my hopes and dreams. But here
it is ━ the winter of my life, and I am caught by surprise. How did I get here
so fast? Where did the years go and where did my youth go?

I remember well seeing older people through the years and thinking that
those older people were years away from me and that winter was so far off
that I could not fathom it or imagine fully what it would be like.

But here it is. My classmates and my friends are retired and have grey hair.
Many are bald.

Taking an afternoon siesta is no longer a treat. It has become mandatory,
most especially after driving a car, no matter how short the distance.

When watching television, I always fall asleep on the sofa. I no longer go to
the cinema to view any movie on the big screen. It’s just a waste of money.
I always fall asleep.

Life is a gift. Whenever I wake up, I thank God knowing that each morning is
a big bonus. I could have died in my sleep. But here I am doing this editorial.

I am still alive.

I forget names. I meet people everyday. Their faces look familiar but I just couldn’t remember their names . . . how and where we met. Sometimes I do
but it takes a while ━ a few minutes or even an hour.

How did I get here so fast? Is it really the “winter of my life?” I consider myself lucky having reached this far. Everybody dies. We are all mortal beings. Nobody lives forever.

━ DMC